Day 4… ugghh, I hate depression

I got up this am, well reluctantly, which was the first time this week. I didn’t want to get up that shoudl have been a sign right there. I made breakfast and I took my daughter to school and then went to the gym. I felt great at the gym I even did more cardio then I was supposed to.

As soon as I got home, I looked at my house and I felt overwhelmed. I hate this. I made my snack ate it and then just sat there, close to crying. I fell asleep on the couch and woke up an hour later with a headache. It was lunch time and I made my lunch (thank Chuck I had prepped lunches, so I could just pop it in the microwave to heat) then went to bed and layed down.
Yup I was hit by a small depression episode. I used to take meds and was in therapy, but 3.5 years ago when I got rid of the most Toxic person in my life, suddenly I didn’t need those things. I still have bad days and today is not even a really bad day, but it’s a bad day. I am fortunate enough to regognize that it is a bad day. I wanna sit here and just cry and I don’t know even why? I hate days like today.
Depression is hard, it cuts into your life, and it makes you feel worthless. I know that I did good by going to the gym and not eating crap, but I still feel sad.

Tomorrow will be a new day and I will keep fighting, I have a wonderful husband, my kids, my family, my friends and Jared Padalecki to fight for.

Sorry for the ramblings… 🙁

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